Too Serious

Dear Rory,

People find me so funny that at times it can be uncomfortable.
How do I get them to take me more seriously?

Signed,
Hilariously Heavy Hearted 

Dear Heavy Hearted,

:/ Dear Rory has to deal with this problem as well ~.~. ALWAYS.(-_~) No matter what or how you say something, people always find it humorous and don't listen the bitch slap of a comment you trying to slather upon them. ^.o.^
The best soloution I've found thus far are to put in a lot angry/evil looking emoticons. :D
for example: That was my brie and apple sandwich =.= (evil eye)
or 
How dare you say I look like Pink Slime! >.> (dagger eyes)
or
Why did you sell my cat to the chinese restaurant .... again? Q_Q (tears)
or This chicken tastes familiar 0<>0
or OMG. You are so Funny! (^o^) ...... doesn't really apply to this serious post. =.=
and
My very favorite of all (I learned it from a 20ish year old computer game student) is:
>:( 
^ rape face http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=rape%20face=.=    d(@.@)b   >.<   >:(

<3 Happy Emoticoning <3,
Dear Rory >:(