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Llama Llama Duck

9/26/2012

 
Dear Rory, 

I've recently decided to commission a sculpture from a local artist. My chosen subject will be an impressionist rendition of three squirrels fighting over a discount bin CD of Milli Vanilli in a Target store located in Bumblefuck, Arkansas. What, in your opinion, is the best medium for this sculpture, and on top of the commission, would a lobster encased in Lucite make an appropriate gratuity? 

Thanks, Ronnie R.
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Dear Gentle Reader,

When I think of Milli Vanilli, I think of Llama poo.  It's sure to be a winner and the squirrels will love it!  In lieu of a commission or lucite lobster, I'd appreciate it if you just adopted a Llama instead.

http://www.solollamas.org/adopt.html

Just think of the endless hours of enjoyment you'll have with your new Llama!

Love always,

Dear Rory

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=08BRy0MoIA8


I like big butts and I cannot lie

9/25/2012

 
Just because I like Butt:
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and, pretty face (almost as good as a nice butt) 
:
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with Love,
Dear Rory

Ann is a cocktail noob

9/19/2012

 
Dear Rory, 
I am a fan of cocktails as much as the next person. However, as I arrive to the bar by myself, excited about what new drink shall I try until the barkeep becomes my new best friend, I disappoint myself when I end up choosing the same generic brand drink. Do you have any good suggestions for cocktail n00bs? 
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Dear Ann,
Your choice of cocktail all depends upon the time of day! 
If it is before 11 am, the best thing I can recommend is a Jager Blast. I have no idea what that is, but it sounds like a good thing in the morning.
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If it is noonish you should have a glass of white wine!
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Around 3, you should switch to a White Wine Spritzer.
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Past 4, you should switch to a proper cocktail like a Manhattan!
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For dinner, you should order a bottle of old vine zin.
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and to end the evening, have a breath mint, PLEASE!
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Happy Soup Time! 

With Love Always,

Dear Rory

    Dear Rory

    Amazing Advice. ALWAYS!

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