Blog Archives

Ronnie Razooble

7/26/2012

Dear Rory:

I'm attending the Burning Man Festival this year in Nevada's Black Rock Desert. I'm wondering what kind of shoes will be most appropriate to be worn while drinking cheap beer, dancing through dust storms, and canoodling faerie-wing-wearing 23 year old twinks tripping on mushrooms. Any advice?

Thanks in advance,
Ronnie Razooble

Dear Ronnie,

I think your plan is solid and true. Nothing gets a cute young twink like a pair of snazzy loafers! I always use Aerosoles or Rockports myself; of course with my hearing aid, batteries, medicare and exboirant costs of bath salts, I rarely get to buy myself a new pair.
Those companies I mentioned before, tend to make the most sylsih and comfortable shoes I'VE EVER SEEN! But please don't limit yourself. So I've tried to compile a list that my be helpful.

Here's a Hum Dingger!:

And OOH, wow!

Those 'el keep me up all night

Shizzam!

Hopefully one of those work for you. And if not, just dance in your bare/bear feet. What do those silly twinks care?!

Happy Hunting,
Bear Rory

P.S. Please feel free to posy your own recommendations!

Picture of the Day!

7/26/2012

Fart Box

7/16/2012

Dear Rory,

Is it inappropriate to ask a man to tongue the fart box while he's nuzzling my oyster?

Yours Truly,
Gidget Areola

For those Gentle Readers that aren't privy to the lingo, please take a glance at the examples:

Oyster

Fart Box

Dear Gidget,

That sounds like a perfectly reasonable request to me. I mean, while down there one should take care of any and all business. Get to it!
The only recommendation I can make is to give it another name other than "fart box". Something that sounds a little more delectable/"classy" and a little less gassy. That is why Dear Rory is here to help!
After polling a number of professional word smiths (a.k.a some homeless guys I met on the subway today). I have come up with some marvelous alternatives that will get your man coming back and begging for second helpings!

Fart Box no. It's a:

Hidden Treasure Trove
Care Bear EaterAsspussy
Chocolate starfish
Rosebud
Balloon knot
Hershey Highway
and my personal favorite,
Chocolate Lava Cake

Why have dessert when you can have a Fart Box?!

Best Wishes,
Dear Rory

Khallis Of Ardent Flame

7/16/2012

Dear Rory,

I have this obsession with killing asmos. I hate the black wings, the stink, and the gutteral sound of thier wretched speach. What is wrong with me?

Khallis

Gross! Super Sick! Barf!!!!

Dear Gentle Reader,
As a fellow Aion player, I understand the deep and undying hate of the beady eyed, claw fingered, bad breathed hairbacks (a.k.a Asmodians).
Every time I see a member of this race (if you can call it that) I get an itching in my fingers to hit the 2 key. It's my stab, stab stabby key. So I think we must both suffer from the same affliction. *Stab, Slap, Kill*
So I say we take a step back and look at the larger picture. The game makers have put us against each other. The game makers make their names blood red. The game makers rape us for money at every chance they get.

It's not the Amos that are our enemy, but NCSoft. *plays dramatic music*

Happy Hunting,
Dear Rory

Picture of the Day!

7/16/2012

Ronnie Razooble

Picture of the Day!

Fart Box

Khallis Of Ardent Flame

Picture of the Day!

Dear Rory

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