My vagina hurts all the time, what do I do?
Please know that I can barely spell Gental Reader at this point. Go margaritas!
Your problem sounds of great importance and I shall address it as such. An unhappy vagina = an unhappy reader. And I never like an unhappy reader.
First of all let's ask ourselves: Why is your love muffin/bread maker/pineapple juice central unhappy? <insert images of several bread makers>
Additionally, I hear cranberry juice helps hurting "flowers that are ripe to bloom" into happy blossoms. Sooooo: Cranberry+Vodka+ Proper Bartender = No Pain, Maybe New Boyfriend and Good Times. Drink it up darling!
P.S. and your pineapple is not a clown car. Do not become a Michelle Dugar. Georgia would not approve.